Journey to heaven
by moonygarou
Summary: AU: Muggle Remus and his last journey.


**Disclaimer:** All the characters belong to the wonderful JK Rowling.

**Author Note:** This was written for the AU Challenge at the lj remusxsirius community. I am not to sure about the title so if anyone has a better idea please tell.

**Warning:** Character death, total AU-ness, muggle and cursing Remus, and un-beta-ed.

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Remus sighed heavily, everything seemed to go against him during the last few days. The amount of medicine that was being pumped in to his veins didn't seem to be helping but instead it made himself feel even worse then he had been feeling before, even his hair was starting to fall out something that he didn't like at all. Every day passed by like another and Remus wondered when the day would come that his life would end. He wanted it to end, he wanted it to end that desperately that the doctors were checking on him constantly just to make sure that he wasn't going to commit suicide. The pain grew worst with every day and the morphium didn't help the way it should.

Curling up under the blanket he turned his gaze towards the window in his room. It had started to snow the day before, it had been the first thing since half a year that had somehow brought him hope. Still everything seemed to be so much out of reach, he wasn't allowed to step outside without the fear of catching a cold that could bring his death closer, something nobody seemed to want to consent. Didn't they understand, that his life was coming to an end and that even Remus was looking forward to his death, looking forward to the day he would be relieved from his pain, he didn't want to spend his days lying in a hospital bed rotting away. He wanted to have fun, he wanted to see things he hadn't seen before, but most of all what he felt most desperate for was for someone take care of him. Of course his mother still came every weekend to see how he was, but she like everyone else from his family was scared that even the slightest touch might contaminate her. Ridiculous woman, no one understood that he was just still a person as well. Of course he had an illness that couldn't be cured that easily and was quite dangerous, it didn't mean that he should suddenly should be spared from the affection that he had gotten before.

Trying to push away the tears and despair that was once more building up inside of him, Remus closed his eyes, hoping that for once the medicine would do its job and give him the rest he needed. However his rest was short lived as the door of his room opened and a black haired man looked inside his room. A rather good looking man, Remus added as an afterthought but quickly shook the thought of again.

Both of their eyes met for second making it Remus impossible to tear his eyes away, even forgetting to ask the man of what he wanted, and if it wasn't his business that he should better fuck off again and leave him, the dying man, on his own.

"Do you mind if I come in?" the man asked, and Remus just nodded feeling actually quite shocked. Not being able to form the words that were resting persistently on his mind, he watched with shock how the other man entered, closed the door behind him and sat down on the edge of his bed. Well that man had nerves and Remus wanted to ask the other man of what he thought of what he was doing. However the words were stuck in his throat and the only noise that passed his lips was a small gurgled sound.

"By the way, my name is Sirius Black. And you are?" that Sirius guy asked next holding out his hand for Remus to take. Remus frowned, that man was acting peculiar, maybe he would have to tell him that he should run for his life before he would be in the same position as Remus was.

"Remus Lupin, and if you are here to pity, then you are at the wrong place so piss off," Remus answered politely shaking the hand that was being held out to him. So there he said it, even if he regretted it right afterwards. His frown deepened, normally he wouldn't feel that horrible when he would tell someone to piss off, actually it gave him some kind of weird satisfaction knowing that there was still some kind of strength left behind in him.

The next thing that happened brought Remus to even more confusion, Sirius actually laughed at his words. Was this man still right in his mind? Remus didn't think he was, and hoped to conjure the most horrible and meanest glare that he could manage.

"What do you think is so funny?" Remus asked as the other man was still laughing, a pout now forming on his face. This was starting to get extremely ridiculous and if this man would continue with his craziness Remus wouldn't stop himself from calling the nurse to let him be send away.

"You actually think that I am here to pity you?" Sirius asked making Remus recoil suddenly as he felt the other man ruffle through his hair. Yes the other man was definitely crazy, time to call the nurse.

"Yes I am, and now if you'd be so nice to leave me alone I was just sleeping," Remus muttered angrily reaching out for the phone on his nightstand, however his hand was grabbed midway. Remus's head snapped up in shock. Sirius's hand was feeling warm against his and it send a warm comforting feeling through him. Pulling his hand out of the grasp from Sirius, he pulled it back against his chest looking for a moment like a quite lost puppy.

"I can't let you do that," Sirius whispered quietly reaching out to tuck some hair behind Remus's ears. Remus blushed, bowing his head slightly shame. He suddenly had the feeling that the other man had the total control over him and Remus had no complete idea why. For some minutes comfortable silence passed through the room and Remus noticed with shock that right now his body didn't seem to be in any, oh the irony of it all.

"What do you want?" Remus asked quietly as he finally found his voice again, slowly daring to look back up at Sirius. As the other man didn't answer at first Remus was about to have an angry fit again, why was the other man not telling him the truth? Did it have something with his illness? Couldn't they do anymore for him and send him home to die from pain exhaustion? All those possibilities made tears well up in Remus's eyes.

"Shhh don't cry… there is no need to," Sirius whispered quietly, and before Remus could react he felt a pair of lips on his cheeks, then on his forehead and then very lightly on his lips. The whole time Remus felt like he was in heaven while at the same time he tried to understand why the other man was doing this. However his thoughts were soon forgotten again as everything seemed to be so light and before he knew it he found himself standing outside in the snow, with Sirius's arms wrapped around his waist.

"Is this heaven?" Remus asked quietly, letting his eyes fall close in bliss and just enjoy for a moment to be able to stand on his own two legs, without the pain running through his body.

"I am sure it is," Sirius answered and while the two of them drifted in to nothing, and Remus enjoyed his new freedom. The rest of the world completely forgot about the man who had died with a smile on his face.


End file.
